Have you ever had a really rough day, but things suddenly feel lighter when you connect with a friend? And when you don’t have a friend to turn to during moments like these, it can feel even more isolating. There are so many benefits to friendship, from brightening your day to creating a sense of belonging. So how do you set yourself up for success in terms of friendship? Here are a few tips on how to be a good friend, whether you are creating new friendships or maintaining them.
1. Actively Reach Out
Life can get crazy sometimes, and it’s easy to get caught up in your own bubble. But if you allow too much time to go by and push off reaching out to your friends, it can slowly create a distance. Just like any relationship, it’s important for friends to feel wanted and appreciated. So if you haven’t reached out in a little while, make an effort to find time for an undistracted phone call or make plans for a dinner date.
2. Be Trustworthy
Like any relationship, trust is truly a foundation for a strong friendship. When you have a friend who you trust, you know that you can go to them with anything, that they will be there for you in need, and that you are not alone. Ways to build trust within a friendship include things like keeping promises, not judging one another, and having each other’s backs whether you are together or apart.
3. Be a Good Listener
Have you ever had a friend who always wants to talk about themselves? Like, you know everything about their life but they know nothing about yours? It’s not the best feeling when repeated over time, so try to steer clear from doing this to others. An amazing way to build strong friendships is through listening actively instead. Show a genuine interest in your friend’s life, their struggles, their aspirations, and the stories that they share. Make an effort to understand their point of view and give your full attention.
4. Respect Boundaries
Just like it’s important to reach out to check in and make time for your friends, it’s equally important to allow them to have space. Does your friend like to stay in on Sundays to tidy up and get ready for the week? If so, try to avoid taking it personally if they aren’t up for plans. Do they have a big event happening in their life that has been taking up their time? If that’s the case, try to have empathy when they are a bit slower to reply. However, if you begin to feel concerned with how you are being treated, make sure you are protecting your own boundaries as well.
5. Be Supportive
True friends are each other’s number one fans through ups and downs! Whether your friend is working toward something they want to achieve, facing struggles, or finally winning big, a good friend is there for the ride and cheering them on. If you find yourself feeling insecure or upset by a friend’s achievements, it could be a good moment to check in with yourself. Hint: Jealousy is not a thriving trait when it comes to friendships.
How to Be a Good Friend Starting Now
Friendship is a beautiful part of life, where friends can truly become family. If you’ve struggled with friendships in the past, it’s not too late to start working toward stronger friendships now. Pick one of these items and make an intentional goal related to it. Have trouble with interrupting too much and not listening? Make a goal to call up a friend and ask them how they are doing (and really listen!). Little adjustments and prioritization of friendship can make a big difference over time. And before you know it, you might start to feel like the happiness you get back is even more than you give.